Why the TOV Center & Why Now?

When my oldest son created a FB account for me, I didn't realize how much I would enjoy re-connecting with people, some of whom I haven't been in touch with for 40 years. Just this week, I had a great time having lunch with some of my friends from my former congregation here in Texas. Invariably, the majority of conversation revolves around "catching up", and then everyone wants to know, "So, what are you doing these days?" I tell them, (and everyone else I meet) about the TOV Center.

For twenty-five years, Jim Myers and I have studied, investigated, written and taught together, working for a better world, with more knowledge, understanding and TOV actions. We developed the TOV Standard from the Ancient Wisdom of Shared Values in order to enable people to Form and Maintain Values-Based Relationships for the Common Good, and for the Good of ourselves as individuals as well.

Human collectives are some of the most powerful forces on the face of the earth. The glue that creates and holds them together is the relationships of the individuals within them and their ability to maintain them. The breaking down of existing relationships within a collective and/or the ability to persuade others to form new relationships are symptoms that the life of the collective is in danger of ending.

For the past few decades, a collective that many of us know very well, has been showing the symptoms of breaking down. The name of that collective is the United States of America. America, unlike other nations, is a collective that formed on ideas and core values. It has no common tribal origin. Instead of relationships between people based on their shared ancestral blood, the American collective is based on relationships between people with those common ideas and shared values in minds. The origin of the nation is reflected in the opening phrase of the Declaration of Independence --" WE the People..." The basic principle being, that the new nation will be governed by a government OF the people, BY the people and FOR the people. The OF, BY and FOR require human relationships.

The bottom line is, the future of America is directly linked to the ability of its citizens to form and maintain relationships with one another. Central to making the decision to form and continue a relationship is our perception of the answer to one question -- Can I trust you? Unlike many other puzzles we confront, questions of trust all share the characteristic of RISK.

Trust implies a seeming unknowable, a delicate problem centered on the balance between two dynamic and often opposing desires -- a desire for someone else to meet your needs and their desire to meet their own needs. Trust isn't just about facts. It's also about trying to predict what someone will do based on competing interest and capabilities. A key factor in predicting what people will do is the values they hold. Relationships built upon shared values have higher levels of trust than those that aren't.

We are now very aware of how toxic the mixture of self-rejection, loneliness and personal isolation can be. Lonely isolated individuals become increasingly susceptible to Authoritarian Appeals (cults). They also disengage themselves from the democratic process. It is no surprise then, that growing numbers of Americans are being drawn to extremist groups and turning away from their options to act as citizen and bring about change.

This is why the TOV Center exists and why it is needed now. As the number of values-based relationships increase, and those with shared values interact -- families will become stronger, the number of friends and confidants will increase, neighbors will connect and make their neighborhoods safer, values will be incorporated into finding solutions to specific problems that will benefit the entire community and help make America a better, more dynamic , purposeful and inclusive place to make a life and live a life.

Everything begins with individuals consciously choosing their core values and learning how to create values-based relationships. The TOV Center's mission is to assist people and help them succeed in this process. This is not a "program" it is a life-long transformative journey. Come join us in this important and very timely work.

Rabbi Jeffrey Leynor

President of TOV Center, Inc.

http://tovcenter.org

PS        Contact me if you would like for me to speak to your organization, congregation or group about the TOV Center.