What Does It Take to Raise a Creative Child? Include TOV!

"Child prodigies rarely become adult geniuses who change the world." So says Adam Grant in the Points section in the Dallas Morning News. The thing that holds them back is that they don't learn to be original. Practice makes perfect, but it doesn't make new! "The gifted learn to play magnificent Mozart melodies, but rarely compose their own original scores. They focus their energy on consuming existing scientific knowledge, not producing new insights. They conform to codified rules, rather than inventing their own. 

Research suggests that the most creative children are the least likely to become the teacher's pet. "In adulthood, many prodigies become experts in their fields and leaders in their organizations. Yet only a fraction of gifted children eventually become revolutionary adult creators. Those who do must make a painful transition to an adult who ultimately remakes a domain."

One study shows that parents of highly creative children encourage their children to think for themselves. They tended to place emphasis on moral values, rather than on specific rules. Emphasis was placed on the development of one's own ethical code. Here is a great opportunity to teach a standard that is inclusive and not extractive, that brings people together instead of splitting them apart, a standard of behavior where parents set the example by their actions and provide a model, a standard that encourages thinking "without the box," a safe place to exchange ideas, no matter how far out they may be. The TOV Standard provides this opportunity. It teaches children (and their parents) to ask this question:

Will my Thoughts and Words lead to Actions that Protect Life, Preserve Life, Make Life More Functional and Increase the Quality of Life or will they Destroy Life, Threaten Life, Make Life Less Functional or Decrease the Quality of Life?

Parents can encourage their children to pursue excellence and success, but they can also encourage them to find Joy in their Work! Their children have freedom to sort out their own values and discover their own interests. "Mozart showed interest in music before taking lessons, not the other way around." Many of a child’s first teachers are not elite musicians, but simply people who happen to live nearby. "What motivates people to practice a skill for thousands of hours? The most reliable answer is, passion-discovered through natural curiosity or nurtured through early enjoyable experiences." Albert Einstein once reflected, "Love is a better teacher than a sense of duty."

We can include here the over emphasis on standardized testing! Jonathan Cole, a Professor at Columbia University says: "What we have witnessed here in the United States is the TYRANNY of high-stakes testing and the belief that you can measure ability-by simply looking at SAT scores."  I have never been a proponent of standardized tests; they showed nothing of my creative abilities and my experiences, but were a factor when I applied to Rabbinical School. My GPA at Rutgers was high, Phi Beta Kappa, Who's Who in American Universities and Colleges, Rutgers Honors, Rutgers Scholar.  My GRE scores were, "Eh", but my experience, creativity and personality and my answers in the interview played an important role as well. At Hebrew Union College (Reform), the second question they asked me was about my GRE scores. In my interview at The Jewish Theological Seminary (Conservative, where I attended) -- that was their last question.

If you want your children to bring original ideas into the world, provide them a model and teach them the TOV Standard and TOV actions. Let them pursue THEIR PASSIONS, not yours!

Would you like to gather with others and learn more about the TOV Center Vision and the benefits of incorporating TOV Values and the TOV Standard in their lives the lives of their children? If you would be interested in attending or holding a gathering, CLICK HERE to email me.  I would appreciate it if you would do one or both of these:

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Shalom,

Rabbi Jeffrey Leynor