Right to Believe & Responsibility to Examine

Emotions on the Ocean: Some Reflections

I recently returned from a once in a lifetime trip. I spent seven days aboard the Caribbean Princess officiating a young man's Bar Mitzvah. All of this is due to his family's graciousness and generosity, something they have always shown me over the past 30 years. I enjoy doing alternative rites. They take on much meaning for those who participate and it gives me the opportunity for one on one study with kids who really want to do a meaningful ceremony -- one that sets them on the path of TOV, of actions and behaviors that reflect the Values of their tradition. As I said before, a Bar/Bat Mitzvah is not a day, IT’S A LIFE! Otherwise, you have what one rabbi described as, "Riteless Passages and Passageless Rites."

My student, Steven, did a great job. It was an absolute pleasure to work with someone who was engaged and asked questions; and whose dad also participated in the studies and discussions. Steven's portion was the beginning of the Book of Exodus, which in Hebrew is the word Sh'mot, which means Names. We are given names when we're born, and then there are other names we acquire by our actions and behavior as we go through this life. We become associated with words like," kind, generous, trustworthy, righteous and TOV," and the opposite, "liar, cheater, blamer, monster, and RAH (opposite of TOV)" and the like.

During the journey we passed through some rough seas. I was on one of the upper decks looking through the large windows at the churning sea. Here we are in an endless ocean on a massive ship with over 4,000 people, with all that technology and a ship designed to go through storms, being tossed around like a bathtub boat. You could see the wind whipping the water into huge mists. It occurs to you at moments like that just how really puny humans are. This was a storm, not a hurricane or a typhoon and we find ourselves at the mercy of the awesome power of nature and this planet! For me, looking at the artwork always reveals something about the Artist. (And OK, I admit it, I really did run around the ship singing, "Yodee Hodee Shiver Me Timbers Capn's Got The Fever." in my best Jewish pirate brogue)

The other thing I noticed, was that people seemed to be more pleasant to one another, strangers would talk to other strangers and engage with each other in various activities, even in the elevators. People stopped, held doors and helped others who had challenges getting around. It was uplifting seeing that kindness.

I feel very blessed to have had this experience and look forward to a Year of TOV for all.

Rabbi Jeffrey Leynor

Last Chance to Make 2015 Tax-Deductible Donation

Today is the final opportunity to make a 2015 tax-deductible donation to support the work of the TOV Center. It must be made online for us to receive it today. Your help is greatly valued and appreciated. To donate go to -- http://www.myerscommunications.us/tov_center_donate.html

Two Very Interesting Pew Polls taken in Muslim Countries about Violence and ISIS

Two very interesting Pew Polls were taken in Muslim countries that focus on violence and ISIS. The first was taken in 2013 and is especially important in light of the immigrant questions that are in the minds of so many Americans. Keep in mind that it was taken in 2013. Pay close attention to Muslim Views on Suicide Bombings table. Read the complete survey at -- http://www.pewglobal.org/2013/09/10/muslim-publics-share-concerns-about-extremist-groups/

The second poll was taken in 2015. Recent attacks in Paris, Beirut and Baghdad linked to the Islamic State in Iraq and Syria (ISIS) have once again brought terrorism and Islamic extremism to the forefront of international relations. According to newly released data that the Pew Research Center collected in 11 countries with significant Muslim populations, people from Nigeria to Jordan to Indonesia overwhelmingly expressed negative views of ISIS. Read the complete 2015 survey at -- http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2015/11/17/in-nations-with-significant-muslim-populations-much-disdain-for-isis/

For NONES TOV Values is a Place to Start

A Dallas Morning News article, "Having faith, if only for kids' sake," caught my attention. Did you know, that "No Religion" is now the fastest growing religious group in America, with 23% of the country identifying themselves that way? In her book, Losing Our Religion: How Unaffiliated Parents Are Raising Their Children, writer Ruth Graham looks at how contemporary "Nones" - people who report that they have no religious affiliation whatsoever - handle the question of moral and spiritual formation with their children. She says of herself that she's been a church member for most of her adult life, but years without regular attendance, her theology is "squishy" and she does not really pray.

So what draws her soul? The warm memories and rituals of faith she is comfortable and familiar with- the songs, the stories, the bread and wine, are meaningful to her, but she can't say much for certain beyond that. She has a 3-year old daughter and wants to raise her with the songs and stories and to get the moral and personal  grounding that she and her husband were raised with --  but doesn't want her to be raised in fear of a Hell she doesn't believe in. Why pretend to believe if you don't, and why inculcate your children into a tradition you rejected?

"Kids ask questions about death, identity and other subjects that most of us haven't grappled with since we were teenagers. When a child is watching your every move, being a None is no longer a lack of religion, but an identity that has consequences for another human being, and a mirror that reflects back what you actually believe, rather than what you THINK you believe."

Graham also points out that at this early stage of the None Revolution, the research on raising kids with and without faith is mixed. With the rise of Social Media, there is less social pressure to affiliate with a religious institution. Some studies have shown that religious kids are better behaved and psychologically healthier, while other show that secular kids are uniquely empathetic and less prone to peer pressure. A new study of 1,000 children from six countries found that those raised in religious households-most of them Christian or Muslim-were more selfish than their nonreligious peers. The crux of the matter is this:

We will never be able to agree about our THEOLOGIES and our MYTHOLOGIES and which are TRUE or WHO'S RIGHT! This AUTHORITARIAN approach has failed miserably and the result is the world we have now and the society we have now. Mutually exclusive groups defending their BS (Belief Systems) – many trying to persuade everyone else they are right while others use violence, terror and death!

We believe TOV Values are good OPTIONS for all people, especially Nones.

(1) TOV Values do not require anyone to "belief in” or “explain” a Deity.

(2) TOV Values do not require anyone to "not belief in” a Deity.

(3) TOV Values do not seek the death and destruction those who disagree.

(4) TOV Values encourage interactions with people who disagree.

TOV Values are based on ancient tried and proven wisdom that values and focuses on LIFE, AFFIRMING LIFE, PROTECTING LIFE, PRESERVING LIFE, INCREASING LIFE'S FUNCTIONALITY AND QUALITY FOR EVERYONE. TOV offers a common ground, an opportunity for AGREEMENT, EDUCATION, RECONCILIATION AND RESOLUTION OF PROBLEMS.

And for the Nones, TOV Center Gatherings are safe places to explore all RELIGIOUS MEMES (Beliefs) – especially those you struggle with – openly, transparently and in light of facts. The TOV Values approach uses stories that are familiar to over two billion people to teach values-based lessons -- a good place to start when you're searching for the values you wish to teach to your children. All children love stories and nothing is more powerful than a parent telling a child a story!

Parents may be sure that sooner or later, their children will ask questions about right, wrong, life, death and a host of other issues. The answers they are given are important in shaping their belief systems and creating their realities – the way they view and understand life. Our children deserve answers that we have given serious consideration, answers we demonstrate in our lives.

It is very important to learn about and teach TOV Values for "Kids'" sake, but there are two additional very important reasons.

(1) Humans depend on other humans for their very survival and that requires relationships.

(2) Democracy requires citizens who share a common identity and core values – “We the people.”

We created the TOV Center to educate people about TOV Values and provide opportunities of self-discovery through interactions with others. We invite you to join the journey with us – CLICK HERE.  

Choose Life First By Doing TOV!

Rabbi Jeffrey Leynor

The Real History Of Hanukkah Is More Complicated Than You Thought

Americans who know anything about the Jewish holiday of Hanukkah may have heard that it celebrates the victory of good over evil -- the triumph of light over darkness. But the real history of Hanukkah’s origins is more complicated. It is as much the tale of a Jewish civil war as it is about successful resistance against foreign interlopers.

● In 175 BCE Antiochus IV Epiphanes ascended to the Seleucid throne and initiated an explicit program of hellenization in the Jewish territory -- promoting the values of worldly knowledge, physical beauty, hedonistic indulgence and polytheistic spirituality.

● Antiochus’ measures were welcomed by some local Jews and Antiochus encouraged the development of the Greek educational system in Jewish society.

● A growing number of Jews began worshiping Greek gods, too.

The rising influence of hellenism was not immediately a source of open conflict within the Jewish community. But, eventually, Antiochus and his Jewish allies, including the high priest Menelaus, pushed the more pious Jews too far in a campaign of radical hellenization in 167 BCE:

● prohibited fundamental Jewish practices, such as circumcision, on pain of death

● introduced foreign rites into the Jewish Temple

● forced Jewish pilgrims to sacrifice pigs on the Temple altar

● built an altar to Zeus on top of the sacred altar to the Yahweh

● allowed prostitutes to solicit their services freely on the Temple grounds

Pious Jews rebelled only when religious persecution reached a level they could no longer tolerate. The line in the sand seems to have been the Torah and the [commandments], and the profaning of the ritual of the Temple. A series of cunning Hasmonean military maneuvers and setbacks for the Seleucids elsewhere in their empire helped the pietist militias conquer the city of Jerusalem in 164 BCE. They restored the ancient Jewish rites of the Temple, tearing down the altar to Zeus and other pagan gods.

Several centuries later, the rabbis likely developed the miracle-of-oil narrative that is so well-known today in the Hanukkah story. The first mention of the miracle is in a passage of the Babylonian Talmud dating to some time between the third and fifth centuries CE. It gave the rabbis, who were uncomfortable with the Maccabees, a way to say they respected Hanukkah, but they did not think focusing on a military victory and upheaval was a good lesson for Jews to have while living under the Roman empire. They didn’t want little Jewish boys to grow up and try to be Judah the Maccabee and attack the Romans. Read the complete article from which the above information came at -- http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/real-history-hanukkah_566752afe4b080eddf55ff0b

The Closing of the American Jewish Mind

From the earliest years of my childhood, I always learned that the Jewish community valued intellectual debate. I witnessed this at every stage of my Jewish education. I grew up as the son and grandson of Conservative rabbis, attending services every week where the congregants and leaders engaged in vigorous discussions about the meaning of the liturgy. I studied at the Solomon Schechter Day School where my favorite class was Talmud, where our teacher Rabbi Lerner would carefully walk us through each line of text and demonstrate how every word and sentence could be dissected for new meaning. Rabbi Lerner taught us that the Talmud showed us how the Jewish people believed in debate for debate’s sake rather than trying to make everyone conform to the same opinion. That is the essence of Judaism. . . 

We no longer seek debate, nor do many shuls even allow it to happen. We are having trouble being tolerant of the other side. Rather than having different sides of the Jewish community debate the issue of U.S.-Israeli relations, too many shuls around the country are moving in the direction of simply prohibiting one side or the other from having a voice. As this exchange indicated to me, some shuls are now reaching the inevitable next step of slandering the character of fellow Jews simply through their possible associations. Read the complete article at -- http://www.tabletmag.com/jewish-news-and-politics/195443/closing-american-jewish-mind